My Sister

My sister. I love her and I am much saddened by her deterioration. I don't know how to help her, perhaps I need to trust that I don't know what's best for her. I can only ask her.  "What's best for you?" I can ask her. And when she tells me, help if I can.

I can't take away her hurt and she cannot hide. It comes out of her in ways that frighten me. I feel that I have failed her. I don't have control or power over her, not much influence at all. I don't even know whether I speak the same language as her.

Too much death. Personal and worldwide.  It weighs heavy on me. In the last 2 years I lost my remaining uncles, a cousin, a dear friend's husband, another college friend, my mother a little more than a year ago, and now my nephew.  I fear that my sister will succeed soon in poisoning her remaining organs with alcohol, until she finishes the process she began a couple decades ago.  Death is impartial.

There have been numerous mass killings in the U. S. and around the world by deranged people, some self-proclaimed terrorists, and we continue to fight wars where we don't belong. Innocent people, often referred to as collateral damage, die from these wars.

My spirit is sad.